C.R.A.F.T.

 I originally wrote this August 10^th, 2010.  Not much has changed since then… if anything – it’s gotten worse! 

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I list on my resume: Strong ability to Multi-task.  I put that because I want any future potential employer to know that I thrive on being all over the place.  If I went to a Dr – they would probably diagnose me with AADD.  I’ve saved them the trouble and diagnosed myself.  My positive spin is that I multi-task well.

Let me describe a little about my day.  I work from home.  So I have dual jobs.  I can take a break from my paid job and tend to some of my housework during my breaks.

When I wake up in the morning, it’s “my job” to turn on the pot for coffee.  Mind you, my husband was raised with 4 sisters and is no rookie when it comes to housework.  He had a big family but his mother didn’t discriminate when it came to handing out chores – he washed dishes, clothes, vacuumed, swept floors … which I now reap the benefits of – but, it’s “my job” to turn on the pot ;-).  Let’s add in to this scenario that he has to leave the house at 6:15am. One of the benefits of working from home, I basically set my own hours – I don’t need an alarm clock in my life and some of my most creative moments come at 10 o’clock at night when everyone is winding down for the day.  But, it is a partnership and he fixes the coffee (“his job”) just the way I like it – so, I guess even though I wake up at an un-Godly hour – it’s not in vain.

The rest of my day generally goes like this:

He leaves for work.  I have my coffee and laptop (my lifeline to the world).  Since it’s early (and quiet), I check emails from the day before, browse some regular websites for some early morning news (Newsday, Yahoo, and Facebook) and wait for my cousin (BFF) to get online so we can have coffee “together”.

·        I let the dogs in.

·         I Go out with my pooper scooper and find the land mines.

·         Come in – wash my hands and get back to where I left off. 

·         Coffee is low. 

·         Get up to make coffee. 

·         Dogs need a snack (they were good for pooping outside).

·         Turn on the pot.

·         Give the babies their snacks.

·         Take out the garbage (because I’m waiting for the water to get hot).

·         Someone dropped some papers in front of the house – go pick them up, put them in the garbage.

·         Walking back in – the entry needs to be swept. 

·         Go to the garage, to get the broom and everything is thrown all over, so I need to organize it. 

·         I get everything in order.

·         Close the garage door to go back inside.

·         CRAP!  I forgot to get the broom. 

·         Go back to the garage, find the broom.

·         Sweep up the entry. 

·         I notice my fern needs water so I set the broom down, go inside and get the water jug. 

·         Fill it up and see the babies need fresh water. 

·         I fill their dish and their food dish while I’m at it. 

·         Go outside to water the fern – left the broom by the door.

·         Put the broom away.

·         Water the fern.

·         Come in and put the jug away.

·         Go sit in front of my laptop.

·         Where’s my coffee?

·         (Mental head slap).

·         Water’s not hot anymore.

·         Turn the pot on.

·         Go get a load to put in the washer (while the water heats up).

·         Make the bed.

·         Use the bathroom.

·         Go back in the kitchen.

·         Forgot the load.

·         Go back in the bedroom.

·         Get the clothes.

·         Turn on the washer.

·         Get everything measured out.

·         Get the clothes in.

·         Check on my water – it’s hot!

·         Fix my coffee.

·         Sit down – 6 new emails.

·         Answer emails.

·         Chat with Cousin.

·         Why is the wash not done yet?

·         BRB Cousin

·         Forgot to close the lid – SHEESH!

·         On the way back to the laptop – kitchen needs tidying.

·         Load the dishwasher.

·         Let me check the living room for dirty cups.

·         Dogs want to go out.

·         Let the dogs out.

·         Man the shelf is dusty.

·         Go get the duster.

·         Dust.

·         Why are Raquel’s sneakers in here?

·         Set the duster on the couch.

·         Bring her sneakers in her room.

·         Hey, that’s my _____!

·         Put my ____ back in my room.

·         Tidy the bedroom.

·         Back to my laptop.

·         BACK Cousin

·         Coffee is cold.

·         BRB Cousin

·         Coffee in Microwave – 30 seconds

·         Washer is done.

·         Clothes in the dryer.

·         Why is the dishwasher open?

·         Oh yeah, dirty cups in the living room.

·         Go get the cups (and the duster).

·         Load the dishwasher

·         Back to laptop – Cousin is gone.

·         I took too long when I said BRB.

·         Where’s my coffee?

This is all before 9am – when my “workday” starts.  I sit in front of my laptop until my next “break” and then the “multi-tasking” begins all over again!

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Something I hadn't anticipated.. The older I get the more I think I suffer from C.R.A.F.T.
Can't Remember A Fucking Thing

The humor in growing old

“Getting old is mandatory, growing up is optional”
~Chili Davis



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I’ve traded my acne cream for wrinkle cream. I take vitamins to support heart health and digestive balance. I have to color my hair every four to six weeks to cover the phenomenal amount of wisdom I’ve accumulated over the past 45 years (If you saw how much grey hair I have – you’d think I was a GD genius!). I know aging is a process and is inevitable – but honestly – since I hit 40, aging has become a steep mountain and I am the snowball at the top. This shit is for the birds!

Aboy was 19 years old when we met; I was 21. We have grown up together. He reminds me all the time that I am older than him, Whatever!. As we draw closer to 24 years together – we’re beginning to grow old together. The difference in our aging process – I’m not in denial (besides coloring my hair).

I realized I was getting old when I’d wake up sore and the extent of my physical activity the day before was sitting in front of my laptop all day. Exercise – (which is a whole other blog post) is way over-rated and my theory is – life is tied into fate and destiny… why chance it by keeling over on a treadmill?

Aboy has been in denial. He turned 40 in 2008. It was a pretty uneventful birthday because Aboy still thinks he’s 27. Seriously – he’s put on 100 pounds since I met him in 1988 and still gets out on the basketball court trying to hang with the young guys.

Since we’ve moved to Texas – he’s become a little more realistic. He still goes down to the Rec, but instead of playing on the “NBA court” (you know, the 20 somethings that played sports in high school), now he plays on the “NBDL court” (the kids who were picked last in gym class). He’s a beast on the “NBDL court”!  I believe he’s good for 1 good game on the “NBA court” (Don’t tell him I said that – I’ll never hear the end of it!)  

*For those that don’t know the NBDL is the NBA’s Development League.

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I have worn glasses since I was 19 years old. When I started driving a cab – my distance vision, specifically at night, began getting blurry.  It only took a few years before I was required to wear glasses full-time and now there’s actually a restriction on my license that I have to drive with my glasses on.

I love my glasses. I believe they make me look like an intellectual – and as long as I can keep my mouth shut – people really believe I’m pretty smart!

Aboy is not as comfortable with glasses. He’s been struggling for almost 2 years now – trying to read the fine print on labels and if I send him a text message at night – fuhgetaboutit!

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This morning, Aboy and I were up extra early (also age related). It was so early, the sun wasn’t up yet. We were drinking coffee and watching the news and had a lamp on in the living room so we weren’t sitting in the dark.

Yesterday, I had purchased some dietary supplements so we can add them into our diet. Aboy tends to eat a lot healthier than I do – but, as we’re aging, we both need more of the stuff that we aren’t getting enough of – like antioxidants, omega 3’s and probiotics. I had put the 3 boxes on his table last night because he said he wanted to see what the supplements contained.

So, this morning, while we were sitting in the living room (waiting for the sun to rise), I said, “How many of those vitamins do I have to take a day?” 

Aboy picked up the box and moved it under the gleam of the lamp. He squinted and adjusted the distance so he could focus in… then put the box back on the table and said “I’ll read it later – when the sun comes up”.

I looked at him and my expression screamed “Seriously?”

After a long minute - I said “When are you going to get reading glasses?”

I've told you, Aboy watches a lot of movies and many of our conversations mimic lines out of a movie he's watched. Sometimes when he speaks, it's straight out of the movie "Eddie Murphy - Raw" when Eddie Murphy's father PUT THE RULES UP!  <~~ (Click that!) 

Without hesitation, Aboy dignified my question with - “I ain’t wearing no glasses! I’ll be walkin’ into walls in this bitch before I put glasses on my eyes!”

Yea, just call me Lillian!

After I wiped the tears from my eyes and caught my breath from laughing hysterically I tried to picture what our house would look like with bumper guards and padding on the walls. 

Maybe it’ll be easier to get him some knee pads and a helmet.

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This is “Life in my Nutshell” at its finest!

An offer you can't refuse: Coupon Organization

“Before anything else, preparation is the key to success”
~ Alexander Graham Bell

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I have received a few inquiries on how I organize my coupons – because I’m able to find such great deals while I’m shopping.

It’s easy to have all your coupons matched up (with the sales) and pulled out all ready prior to going to the store (recommended), but what happens when you find a great unadvertised sale or clearance item that you think you have a coupon for?

I am a strong believer in preparation. If you put the work in on the front end, you'll reap the fruits of your labor.

My advice: You should use what makes sense to you.

If you prefer a shoe box, clipping your coupons while you’re in the store, envelopes or ziplock bags… it’s your hobby, you have to do what works for you.

What works for me is binders with clear sleeves and dividers. I also carry a small accordion file – separated by store - to keep my coupons apart while I’m shopping.

Since I carry so much, I’ve converted an old beach bag into my coupon satchel. It works (for me).

My binders have zippers because on (rare) occasion, I’m a klutz. Plus, from throwing them into the back seat, into the coupon bag, pulling them out of the bag, etc… I don’t want anything to fall out – losing it’s place.

I use 2 binders.

1 for Foods (edible) and 1 for Non-Foods (everything else).

I use clear dividers with pockets – and I’ve given them labels like:

• Hair Care

• Facial Care

• Dental Care

• Women's Supplies

• Cleaning Products

• Paper Products

• Medicine

• Vitamins/Supplements

• Canned Goods

• Dry Goods

• Snacks

• Cooler

• Freezer

I have various size clear sleeves – to hold different sized coupons. I like to be able to see the entire coupon so at a glance I can see if it’s expired, how much I will save, size, etc.




In the front pocket of my binder - I keep printed copies of all the coupon policies for all the stores I shop at.

I was going to alphabetize my coupons – but, with them all viewable, I figured I’d use the time I saved to play on Facebook and write my blog (tee-hee).

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My accordion file (which I found on clearance at a craft/hobby store) I have divided by number and then assigned each store a number. I printed out the reference so, I can quickly locate what I need, while I’m in the store

I did this for 2 reasons.

1.      At first, I used zip lock bags (by store) to separate my known deals, but I was finding it hard to stay organized for my finds or separating out the coupons that I had for items that weren’t in stock or weren’t going to work. Now, I just reach into the appropriate file pocket when I get to the register and all the coupons I’m going to use are in one place.

2.      I can store my Store coupons and Store cards in each store’s file pocket – so, everything is together.

It’s small enough that I stick it between both binders in my coupon satchel. 

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However you decide to organize your coupons, don’t invest too much money. Couponing is a work in progress and as you figure out what you’re doing, you’ll find deals to help you organize!

An offer you can’t refuse: San Antonio couponing adventure

Since we were going to San Antonio and would have a couple hours to kill before the basketball game started, naturally – I brought my coupons! 

 

I had heard from a friend that it was hard to extreme coupon in San Antonio because they only have 2 major stores to shop at – but, I don’t believe the paint is wet, so I figured I’d touch it J

The paint was dry.

I purchased $110 worth of items for less than $9… almost a 92% savings.

I’d say San Antonio has potential!

I spent $8.77 and purchased

• 16 Aquafresh toothpastes (travel size)

• 12 Carmex lotions (travel size)

• 6 Wet Ones Wipes

• 6 Nabisco Cookies

• 4 Nature's Bounty Dietary Supplements

• 4 Reach Floss

• 2 Finish Quantum Dishwasher Detergents

• 1 Tylenol Precision Pain Relief Cream

The toothpaste and lotion we’ll donate to the local food bank. If someone doesn't have money for food, they definitely don’t have money for toothpaste or lotion. They were all free (I actually made 3¢ on each one of the toothpastes) and we all ready have plenty at the house.

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It’s very hard to extreme coupon in Texas. Many of the stores are not coupon friendly. They impose coupon restrictions and not too many stores double or triple coupons – but, with a little homework and a lot of patience… there are substantial savings out there.

Saving money on personal care items, over the counter medications and vitamins – opens up funds for things that don’t traditionally have coupons like fresh fruits, veggies and meats.

Walmart is everywhere. In their quest to be the “be all - end all” to consumers – they will match any competitor’s price, they take coupons and if you have an overage on a purchase, they allow the overage money to go towards the basket cost (they give cash back).  

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I was having a great day in San Antonio – until I lost my wallet. We had lunch at McDonalds and I must have set it down while we were eating; then we left in a hurry – I didn’t realize it was missing until 10 minutes later.

When I called McDonalds to see if someone had turned it in… they told me no and when they checked the seat where I was sitting – it was gone.

I only had a couple bucks on me – it’s just the other shit that’s so frustrating, replacing my driver’s license, social security card, my credit cards, all my pictures that were in there <sigh>.

I filed a police report and canceled everything – but for the life of me, I can’t understand why people are so dishonest. Nothing good comes to anyone that steals from other people. Even if they had kept the couple dollars –they could have turned the wallet in to a cashier.

Such as life…

On a more positive note – it’s not as hard to replace all your stuff as it was, let’s say 24 years ago (the last time I lost my wallet).

The basketball journey

When I was growing up – there was a surge in organized sports. Traditionally, there was Little League baseball or CYO basketball but when I was about 10 or 11, Club League soccer came to Bay Shore. As time evolved more sports like softball and lacrosse took hold and parent’s weekends were consumed with tournaments and showcases. Organized sports have opened the door for many athletes to pursue what they love in college and even adulthood.

I actually played soccer until 2005. One of the girls I took dance lessons with, as a kid - coached soccer at the Junior High and Raquel tried out for the team. Raquel made the team and the coach and I got reacquainted. She told me she was on a woman’s soccer team and they were always looking for players – so, I went down to play with them. It was an hour on Sunday’s and we played in East Islip, West Babylon and Stony Brook. It was a lot of fun.

It was a 26 and over league – at the time I was in my late 30’s. Just like growing up, I played goalie for the woman’s team. We had a pretty good team and won our division the first year I played. We got a nice duffel bag for our achievement.

How the woman’s league was set up, the top team from our division would move into the higher division and the last place team from the higher division would move down to the lower division. So, we were required to move up to the top division. Of course the top division had a younger, more competitive crowd – making for some interesting games at that level.

I remember one game… in our new division – I came out to make a diving save, cradled the ball in my arms (near my head) and got KICKED in the elbow - inches from my face (leaving a softball sized lump/bruise). I got up (pissed) screaming at the idiot that kicked me – “WE’RE PLAYING FOR A FUCKING BAG!" and continued ranting – "I GOTTA GO TO WORK TOMORROW!”

When I would go to work on Monday mornings (hobbling & bruised), Mike would say “did yous win, at least?”

We didn’t come in first in that division. We finished with a commendable middle of the pack record. No bag though.

Raquel came to all my games and supported me. She played soccer with the school until her freshman year. She was pretty good for it not being her primary sport. I never “pushed” soccer on her because I wanted her to be her own person and pursue what she loved, not what I loved (although I did use some parental influence when she played softball – only because she had the potential to be a great softball player).

After Raquel’s freshman year, she dedicated herself exclusively to basketball.

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I never liked basketball. When I was a kid – I tried to play, but after the first time my finger got jammed trying to catch a pass… that’s all I needed to know that it wasn’t for me!

Aboy put a basketball in Raquel’s hands when she was in the 4^th grade. It was fitting that Raquel would be a good athlete because Aboy and I were both athletic and her brothers and sister played sports and were active too. She was always a tom-boy too and tough was in her blood.

She played with boys until she made the Bay Shore Varsity team in 7^th grade. She was not a phenomenal player – but she was a tough, hard worker and her game improved by playing with the older, more experienced girls. She was cold from the 3 point line, her coach at the time chalked it up to her youthfulness and being unaware of the magnitude her shot would have on the outcome of the game.

I remember sneaking to watch the end of a practice and he saw me standing outside the door. When he came into the hallway he told me “I have to tell you, we are very impressed with Raquel. She is getting stronger and learning so much – but, she plays around a lot!”

When Raquel made Varsity, she was 5’1” tall. She weighed almost 100 pounds. She played with boys for so long, when she took a charge – she covered her nuts (not her boobs – because she didn’t have any). Most importantly – she was twelve. She was playing with and against girls that were 5 and 6 years older than her.

So, when the coach said to me “she plays around a lot”… all I could say was – “She’s 12!  That’s what 12 year olds do!” For the life of me I don’t know why he couldn’t comprehend that as basketball smart as she was – she was still watching Nickelodeon and the Disney Channel (which, BTW at 20… she still does).

By Raquel’s freshman year – she was a part of a group that got Bay Shore to the play-offs, 2 years in a row; an accomplishment that Bay Shore hadn’t seen in over a decade. She had fire, she understood the game and she was determined. She was a defensive animal and received “the terminator” award for Defensive MVP by her coach.

The only thing about playing for Bay Shore - it frustrated Raquel when girls would miss practice because their primary sport was softball or volleyball and they didn’t take the commitment seriously.   

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Raquel’s sophomore year (2006), she accepted a scholarship to play at Oak Hill Academy in Virginia (a boarding school). Oak Hill was a known national basketball program for boys – they’d produced names in the NBA like Jerry Stackhouse (Bucks), Carmelo Anthony (Knicks), Brandon Jennings (Bucks), and Rajon Rondo (Celtics) – but they were making a commitment to the girl’s side to have them nationally recognized as well. They played a national schedule against some of the neighboring state’s top teams. It was a no-brainer for her to make the decision.

She really excelled at Oak Hill. She was the youngest player on the team and it only took her a few games to break into the starting line-up. She helped them win their first National Championship. Not to mention her GPA went up astonishingly – making the honor roll and ranked in the top 5 in her class.  

Playing for Oak Hill did wonders for her college recruitment, too. I remember one game she played in (she's #21 in white), there were 40+ college coaches around the court. After that she received letters of interest from programs like Virginia Tech, Clemson, Wake Forest, and James Madison. Her hard work and commitment really catapulted her to the next level.

This picture was taken at the 2007 US Junior Nationals. Her team won the 15 & under Championship


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Aboy and I were separated at the time and since Raquel was the baby and the older ones were pursuing their own lives, I left New York to follow her. Oak Hill was located (literally) in the middle of no-where in Virginia. It’s in the corner of the map where Tennessee, North Carolina and Virginia come together – in the Blue Ridge Mountains. The nearest grocery store and gas station was 13 miles away… the nearest Walmart was 25 miles. The only way to get cell phone service was through roaming.

When I looked for a place to live, I went on my Sprint map and found the biggest splotch of green and began my house hunt in that area – knowing at least there were some signs of civilization there. I found a house in Mount Airy, NC (Mayberry). I was about an hour from Raquel’s school and made almost every game they played. I drove to Tennessee, Northern Virginia, West Virginia, South Carolina… plus my countless trips to Oak Hill to bring her snacks and supplies. I wasn’t finished watching my baby play.

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Here we are in 2012 and I am still watching my baby play.

When Raquel took the scholarship to play college ball in Texas, Aboy and I told her we would follow her - to support her. In August of 2009, after her first summer session, we were packed and moved to Texas. Let me tell ya, it’s been a helluva journey!

So, just like we’ve done on many (many) occasions, we’re packing a bag to follow her to watch her play. She has a game in San Antonio tomorrow (about 5 hours away) and we’ll be there – supporting our baby.

And, not for nothing – if she decides to play overseas… we may have to learn a foreign language – cause we’re going there too!

I’ve really learned to love basketball!

An offer you can’t refuse: Coupon Motivation

Think about all the things that you are passionate about in your life. Think about the things you can’t see yourself quitting or walking away from.

There are no shortcuts in life. That’s just a fact. If you want success and you “cheat” to get it – it will be temporary.  A strong foundation sustains you because temporary fixes only hold you over for the moment. Commitment, determination and passion will drive you when you have doubts or feel like quitting.

By trade, I’m a software consultant. I consult businesses on best business practices regarding their software choices. I train them how to use the products they purchased and I also write technical documentation to support their newly purchased software – customized to their business process and use. I work closely with the customer in configuring the set-up and also act as a liaison to the company they purchased the software from – handling all the technical specifications and configuration, so they don’t have to worry about that aspect of the installation (implementation).  

When I tell people what I do for a living, my flexible schedule and income capabilities – they want to know how I can put them on. Then I tell them about the hours (and hours) of research, online classes, and non-paid tasks of the job and all of a sudden, you’d think I was shoveling shit for a living.

But you see, I love what I do. It’s easy to me. I have a knack, I love it and even during the shit shoveling part of the job – I know I reap the rewards for my hard work when I bill a customer.

There are some negative points about the type of work I do. I call it the feast or famine aspect of the job. Either I’m making bunko money and living high on the hog or taking freelance writing assignments to pay the minimum balance on my credit card. Definitely not conducive to putting money away for retirement – luckily I have a husband that appreciates my talents and encourages me to pursue what I love. (Trust me, when the money is good – it’s very good!)

Is it for everyone?... probably not – but we live in a country that being a non-conformist (and letting the creative juices flow) is encouraged. There is nothing written that says every day I have to wake up with an alarm clock, schlep (in traffic) 30 minutes to work, sit behind a desk for 9 hours, schlep (in traffic) 30 minutes home and wake up the next day to do that all over again. To me – that’s a creativity killer and I would suffocate if I had to live like that.

Could I do it?  Yeah, if I had to – I could. I actually did it for years – when the kids were little. If I had to do it now, I would exhaust every other avenue before I pursued that lifestyle – because I know me and my patience level… and my situation is different now than it was a few years ago.

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My profitable hobby…

Couponing has turned into a great hobby for me. Just like some like to crochet or paint – it’s something I enjoy doing. It takes all the things that motivate me – research, analysis, strategizing – and produces a positive result. It’s a rush.  

I began couponing in early October, 2011. Aboy and I had watched the show Extreme Couponing and he said WE can do it! It was a challenge to me and it looked like fun – and to this point, I’ve really been having a lot of fun doing it. Not to mention the thousands of dollars in groceries and personal care items I’ve accumulated for pennies on the dollar – the savings has literally kept money in our bank account – that can be used for other things.

In doing the math, I’ve taken our $600+ monthly grocery bill to under $200 a month – in just 3 months. What’s really exciting – the more I coupon, the more I save. My goal is to get us under $100 a month by the summertime.

So, I’m contributing around $400 (or more) a month – without the payroll taxes J. I say or more because I’m also getting items like dog food and treats, hair color and cosmetics for FREE.





How many times have you gotten sick and had to run to the store? Not me - as a matter of fact, Ben just went to the stockpile to get some Excedrin for his headache. I have enough pain relievers, cold/cough and headache medicine to sustain us for at least a year - and it's all name brand - all FREE.



And chapped lips don't stand a chance here. Between Aboy and the kids - they go through chapstick (blistex, carmex, etc) like we own stock in the company - because they lose it or it goes through the wash.  Now, we have enough to last 2 years - all FREE.

So, this is the money I’m not spending – for things that enhance our quality of life – that I wouldn’t necessarily purchase when we go grocery shopping = additional savings.

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When I post my “brag” pictures on Facebook of my receipts or items I got for next to nothing – the most frequent response is – “How do you do that?”, “Teach me!”, or “What’s the secret?”

Then when I share the links of the websites I follow and the amount of effort I put into it –all of a sudden, it sounds like shoveling shit again.

I know couponing is not for everyone. You have to be very organized and disciplined to do it. Some people don’t have the time, strategic vision, or ambition to do it. I think in some cases – some people feel it is beneath them to coupon.

I look at it like this. If something is free (even if it’s something I don’t have a need for), I’m going to get it. If I use it – that’s money I’ve saved and I have become a contributor to the bottom line for our bank account. If it’s something I can’t use – I donate it. It’s not costing me anything – and given the economic climate and state of our country – I’m sure someone can use it. Either way – it’s not costing me anything (other than the cost of a newspaper).

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What’s funny is – I have been contemplating writing this post for a few weeks now. I read this BLOG yesterday and it just reinforced what I’ve been doing for the past few months and how valuable my hobby actually is.