Give thanks, but pay it forward

I got a job offer for an opportunity that kinda dropped in my lap. Whether I get it or not is now out of my hands as we’re in the “background check” stage. I was as honest as possible, but when someone is digging in my past – it makes me a little nervous. Not because I’m a horrible person and didn’t hide the bodies well enough (that is a joke)… but it is human nature to be nervous because you don’t know what can disqualify you.

So, in the background check, of course they call your references, old jobs, check your education – yada, yada. Well, I want to give everyone that I’ve listed on the application a heads up that the company will be calling. I don’t have a need to coach anyone because I don’t burn bridges and have nothing to hide – but out of courtesy – just to let them know, they’ll be getting a call.

I sent an email to my old boss from Northrop Grumman. He is my ace in the hole when it comes to references because I was Mike’s right hand. The more responsibility he gave me, the more I flourished in the position. Not only was he a boss, he was a coach and a friend. He taught me about professionalism ("Hey T, call that fuckin’ guy and find out when he’s going to send over the fuckin' file"), time management ("Hey Cuff, can you quit dragging your fuckin’ feet and give me the GD report?"), and accountability ("Did you actually look at the report before you gave it to me – or just shaded it in with these pretty fuckin' colors?").  I love Mike. Even though we spoke to each other as if we were making mafia deals, to the customer and outside professional world that we dealt with, I never felt like I was left hanging out to dry and I learned a lot about CYA (cover your ass) from Mike. Seriously, he taught me to know the questions before they were asked and about critical thinking and analysis. I feel like my professional growth was in leaps and bounds while I worked with him.

So, I sent him an email – letting him know that he should be expecting a call. I got an out-of-office response to the email saying he was on a Medical LOA and any inquiries should be directed to a guy Chris we used to work with at Grumman.

I called Chris immediately. He told me Mike’s cancer returned and they had to remove part of his lung. I was devastated. Mike and I keep in contact to this day (I left Grumman in 2007) and his pride would not allow him to let me know he was sick again. Chris said to go ahead and call him. I said I’d wait till Monday to reach out to him – even though Chris said Mike said he was feeling better.

Monday morning, I had an email from Mike waiting for me in my inbox. 
This is what he said:
“Nice hearing from you. My Cancer came back and I just had part of my lung removed (11/3)--- sucks but Im recovering…wish it was faster. I love that your still pushing on it Cuff… we ain’t fuking quitters that’s for sure. Anything they need from me let ‘em know I’m available”

I replied that if he wasn’t feeling up to it – I could direct the call to someone else, to which he replied (very sternly) “Tell them I said to call me Cuff”.

OK, I’m not going to argue.

****************

I am so thankful that Mike is in my life. I am grateful for his lessons, his continued support and his friendship. I could never put into words what he has meant to me – but knowing Mike, he doesn’t want a “thanks”, he wants me to take my lessons and improve my life and share those lessons with someone else.

I want to be like Mike. I want to help people. I don’t need a thank you – but I do want whomever I help to pay it forward too.  I also want them to enjoy their life, as I do – regardless to what obstacles they have to overcome.

No one said life was easy – but with a little effort, it is worth it.