I married my Father

I left for Utah on Tuesday for an interview on Wednesday. Aboy dropped me off at DFW. I flew back Wednesday afternoon; get to the house - no Aboy.

He left for Florida, Wednesday morning. Now mind you – he had been in New York since October 22^nd, I literally saw him for one and a half days before we were both off in different directions, again.

So, here it is Sunday.  He’s almost back at the house from his trip to Florida – I want to do something nice for him.

Aboy is a simple man. He has two emotions; hungry and horny. If he doesn’t have an erection, I make him a sandwich. So, I’m going with hungry today.

I texted Aboy when I woke up (here’s the conversation):
Me: Good Morning! <3 I just woke up (well - about 20 mins ago), did my morning ritual before I sat down

Aboy:  mornin sleepy head

Me: I woke up at 3:30, couldn't fall back asleep.

Contemplated getting out the bed at 5ish... NAH...
next thing ya know...
HERE I IS!
WHERE YOU AT CUFFIE?

Aboy: lol I just woke up two hrs ago

Me: oh damn - where you shut it down at?

Aboy: exit 25 on I 49

Me: where is 49?

Aboy: in Louisiana

Me: OH, you took the scenic route on I-10?

So, you dropping the trailer and bringing home the tractor?

Aboy:  yea

Me: good, kid - good :)

Aboy: I should be to the house round 12

Me: What do you want for dinner?

Aboy: sausage stuffing

Me:  that is it? bake some chicken with it or something?

Aboy:  yea. baked chicken.

Me: I wanted to make some curry chicken

Aboy: ok that sounds cool

Me: curried or baked?

Aboy: both

Me: LMFAO, might I remind you there is only 4 of us here?

Aboy: yea but u know they don't eat what I want

Me: So, can I make baked today - curried tomorrow?  I think the baked will go better with the stuffing

Aboy: ok

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Some of you may remember a commercial when we were growing up for Stove Top Stuffing. The Wife asks the Husband: “Stove top or mashed potatoes?”
And the Husband replies (all excited): “Stove Top!”

Not in my house! If my mother asked my father, "Stove top or mashed potatoes?" he said “BOTH!”

Oy vey! I married my father!

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**Just for the record, Aboy will not eat Stove Top OR mashed potatoes, but there's not much else (besides lima beans & liver) that is on the "I won't eat" list.